bizarre

i was just reading 'BANGALORE MIRROR' (a mindless paper, but sometimes a good read) and i saw this article regarding the sex laws in different parts of the world. I'm sure it has caught the attention of a lot of people. it wasn't the topic of discussion that caught my eye, let me assure all of you, but what exactly was written down. and i couldn't stop laughing.

For those of you who do not know what it was about, let me give you a gist. everyone knows what wikileaks are. let me introduce you to wikileaks founder Julian Assange. he was arrested a couple of days ago for breaking a Swedish sex law (i am not going into the intricacies of that event). in light of that arrest, Bangalore Mirror came up with a page long article of all the bizzaro laws countries around the world have regarding sex. Believe it or not, most of these laws come from the United States of America.

one of the world's foremost superpowers, most advanced country in the world, and it is flocked with problematic notions. Those of us who are literature students will be in a better position to understand it, but it isnt exactly rocket science - anyone can get it. if i have already managed to confuse you, what i am trying to say is that what many people consider to be so transparently modern and advance is actually just a bed of falacies and silly beliefs.

Over 10 states in the United States of America have some very funny laws regarding sex. (i dont intend to offend the sentiments of any community. i am also not going to deliberate on the details of these laws wither. i am merely stating that they exist.) What i find so funny is that so many of us consider America to be so modern, open-minded and advanced, given their levels of promiscuity and divorce, that we fail to even consider that they may have such primitive beliefs and laws. i guess, when it comes down to it, we are all just people separated by geographical boundaries. irrespective of the territories in which we live, none of us is really an embodiment of the region that represents us or that we represent.

Globalization has taught me one thing - we are more alike to our foreign counterparts than we suspect. we find someone just like us in every part of the world, irrespective of the language we speak, the food we eat, the clothes we wear, the religion we follow or the colour we have.

as a unit, though, reading that a country such as the USA has such laws regulating a primitive human need only makes the the whole thing seem BIZARRE!!

s.i.s.t.e.r.s.

We all have siblings, whether our own or only cousins is of no consequence. some of us are older, some of us younger and some of us stranded in between. we say that the grass is always greener on the other side, right? it is no different among siblings. the older ones think the younger ones are more pampered and the younger ones think the older ones are given more freedom and independence. it is a never ending story, we all know. for most of us, this is a topic of many a fight. after a point, you just get fed up of it, at least i did. i no longer wanted to bicker with my sister on such a pointless topic. what was the use? There was no winner. Each one had a point to contradict the others, leading to hours of wasted breath.

i finally decided - i understood how she felt. if only i could convince her i knew what she was going through. and then i did, in the best was i knew how - through poetry. i am sure this is something may a sisters' pair will relate to and enjoy. here goes:

I've seen you since you were born,
your tiny hands as i touched,
now these very many years down the line,
i didn't imagine you would change so much.
maybe i though you would stay small forever,
or maybe i just didn't think you would grow,
i cant really place my finger on what the cause is,
whatever the reason be, i just wanted you to know:
i am proud of who you are now, i am proud of what you have become.
i just lived my life and with time i grew,
but i didn't think once that you would too.
i'm sorry i treated you like a child, when really you wanted to break free,
wanting to be treated as an adult, your entreating pleas i failed to see.
it is time, i know, to accept the fact that our little baby is growing up,
and let her make her own decisions, fall down flat and get right back up.
but it will take us all time to let you go, you've been the baby for these many years,
just bear a little and give us time to let you free and show no tears.
it is never easy; i hope you know, to let someone dear, go,
you're not going anywhere, not as yet, but it is very similar to being so.
our dear little child is going off, and a woman in turn, is evolving there,
it's hard for us to accept the change as that little girl is who we see,
what there really is, is a remarkable young woman, going to be.

i know this poem is really long, but it says everything i want to tell my baby sister.im sure that it is the case with several other older children world over. this poem is something every sibling can relate to, and i hope you guys enjoy it too!

fallen wings

i opened my eyes to an unknown place,
i looked around, i was in a maze.
i tried to remember where i am,
but i was nothing more than a stranded lamb.

i stood up slowly and tried to walk,
i stumbled a little, it hurt a lot.
i opened my mouth to yelp in pain,
i tried to get up, only in vain.

i fell back hard on the ground,
on the mass of rubble spurred all around,
as i tried to get back on my feet,
the strength that i had, my heart could not beat.

sunken low, as low as the ground,
as all the world around me frowned,
i raised my head to the sky,
i couldn't walk, if only i could fly.

LOST

it's funny how we find inspiration in the strangest places. some of us find it in the works of great philosophers while others find it among nature's entities. we all often assume that being the older ones, we tend to inspire others. that people will some day follow our footsteps. very rarely does anyone admit to being inspired by someone unknown to the rest of the world, one's very own Aristotle, Shakespeare, Caesar or Van Gogh.

today gave me something to think about. i read something someone very close to my heart wrote. this person is someone younger to me, and on another occasion claimed that i was a role model for that one. i was happy to have done some bit of inspiring for someone else, so you can fathom my level of pride! some how that episode ended there. today, when i did my bit of reading, i started to switch on the retrospect mode.

i realised something. i am a good writer. that is something i have always been credited with. granted, i have never really been happy with what i have written. but, now that i think about it, off late i barely ever write. and when i do, it is less than satisfactory. i write because it is my passion. but somewhere between the assignments, projects, exams, friends and fun, i seem to have lost that passion somewhere. no excuse, i am aware. my mind too is so empty nowadays. i no longer seem to think, as if my brain is on stand still. i dont mean to say that im faring badly in my academia, but that sort of thinking that really matters to me.

it feels to me like i have become this really shallow person lost in a superficial life. i am a very creative person. but i show none of it anymore, because i no longer do anything. a year ago, my note books would be full of doodles and poetry, my head would be full of revelations i would find within me about the world without, and my heart had a piercing pain because of all that agony in my mind. today, every part of me feels numb. i dont seem to think, or feel or even articulate in any way. where did that girl go? where is she lost? what happened to her? i need her back. she deserves to live!!

when we haven't even started....

crying in sadness

When we are old enough, we have so many stories to tell. Some of them are funny, some notorious and some very touching - those intimate moments with loved ones, long talks into the dead of the night, slumber parties with girlfriends, they go on. Remembering any one of them brings back a warm feeling within that makes the whole experience worth it, even if they weren't so good. We remember every single minute spent, the way it was spent, the things that were said and done - it all feels so magical in times of happiness and as if it were miles away in sadness, but we cherish them nonetheless.

monkeying around

Among all those memories, lie for me, those times when we stayed up late into the night, fighting sleep, just to be able to share more thoughts with each other. Start talking about something else and end up totally elsewhere, the entire conversation somehow making sense. a minute, then half an hour, look at the clock and it has been 4 hours, we talk and talk, about everything under the sky, everything around our lives, everything within in and everything without.

Then it comes, the very end, when we are required to stop, exhausted and with a lack of time. Doze off or drift apart. And, then, when you think of it all, you wondered what really you said. we talked for so very long, but there was still so much more to be said. if only there were more time, if only it weren't so late, we could have talked about so much more. But I wouldn't change any of it. I revealed a part of myself today, not everything was said. But there will always be tomorrow, when i will have so much more to say!

fun times with my sister, my best friend, my partner in crime

and the tongue starts to move

How does a quiet, reserved and unassuming girl go to become one of the most talkative people around? some would say they changed, others would perhaps say its inevitable. But, the more I think of it, i seem to have gone to the other extreme. There is only one way I can describe the condition - BIGMOUTHEDNESS! It is a disease, indeed. There is no escaping it. It is a pity if no one has ever thought to discover or invent it. Come to think of it, it is quite a no-brainer. We have foot in the mouth disease, right? This seems to be an ally to that. And why not? This lands you into trouble just as much! 

Granted, it takes some of us a while to open up to others, get comfortable with them, enough to be able to talk to them. But, does that mean you need to divulge so much information that you land yourself in trouble? I hope not. But, I hear it is contagious. So says my friend. I remember the day clearly, I don't think i laughed as hard ever before. We were on our way back home, this was a couple of months ago. We had just gone out to spend time. When we were coming back home, he kept me highly entertained, telling me story after story. I am a person who loves to talk, but apparently, I was just not being given the opportunity. I finally had to tell him to stop talking when he told me this, "I have never been so talkative, you know? Even now, I don't talk as much with anyone as I do with you." I don't think I had ever been so flattered.

But when I reached home, I got to think. Have I really changed so much in such a short while? Memories came streaming back, and in my head appeared the picture of a quiet little girl, too scared to say anything, afraid of the consequences. And today, as i stand in front of the mirror, appears before me a figure, the sight of whom tells me is quite a confident girl, ready to say what she feels, not wondering too much of the consequences.

Quite a change, right? And a pleasant one at that. Doesn't mean that the words are disrespectful or cruel, not intentionally. But, it sure does get me into an awful lot of trouble. Anyone who knows me will vouch for that!! ;)

a winter's wish

GLOBAL WARMING has been the talk of the town for many many months. We talk of how hot the climate is getting, how unbearable the summers are and that there is barely any rain to spare. But as i sit in class this fine Winter morning wrapped in a fine, thick jacket and watch all those around me shivering in the chill and warming themselves up, it takes me back to those days when winters were still cold, and the sun didn't shine all that bright. It makes me think, perhaps I understand what my parents mean when they say that the city was so chill in their days that it was unbearable to step out of the house.

The winter's chill makes me want to cuddle up in bed with a thick blanket, reading a book and perhaps some hot  chocolate. This isn't so much lethargy as it is the desire for warmth and cosiness, the thought of warm, smooth liquids flowing down your throat, satisfying every muscle, bone and cartilage. The piping hot cup between my fingers tingling my sensations, my body craving for more warmth.

Perhaps a bath, in a tub of boiling hot water, its temperature against the chill of the winter, seemingly warm, relaxing the body, easing the muscles and rejuvenating the mind.

The crazy winds blowing all around, ears shut and heads covered. Blowing out the chill that surrounds us, breathes of fog as the early morning mist, exudes the body, perhaps the warmth settling in. These are the things that i dream, these are my winter's wish!!

mom

A teenage daughter's best friend and worst enemy is her MOTHER. They share a bond that no man will ever understand. They fight, they hug, they bicker, they love. It is a very complicated and mysterious relationship, one that evolves in mysterious ways. I love my mother. She has always been one of my closest friends. I can always talk to her about most things.

If someone asked me a year ago how important my mother is to me, I would have said pretty important. Isn't that a good enough answer? I don't think so. In the last year, I have seen a side to my mother and our relationship that I thought we could never share. Today, my mother is my best friend. There is nothing i cant tell her. I can run into her arms when i feel sad or hurt, forget my age and act like a little baby when i am in pain and she doesn't say anything. she only smiles and comforts me. When i am upset with her or angry, she becomes my friend, giving me my space and then consoling me. I can't quite put to words what she means to me.

She is neither my friend, nor my mother. she is sometimes both and sometimes never, but she is always there for me. there are not enough thank yous nor enough sorries in the world that can express my heart's truest feelings, but i know in my heart that in our silent voices, she knows what she means to me. I LOVE MY MOTHER AND THAT IS HOW IT WILL ALWAYS BE!!

P.S: this is a beautiful song, says everything words otherwise fail to say:  http://77.78.160.185/dataup/MUSIC/nova-xr-musika/Steven_Curtis_Chapman-This_Moment-2007-FM/07-steven_curtis_chapman-one_heartbeat_at_a_time.mp3

WATCH THE VIDEO - VERY TOUCHING  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-x8iNm6GgWo

My Problem!!!

I have a problem!!

I am a student of media studies and this semester we are doing New Media. We have been given a task - to start a blog, hence the birth of this account. Writing, for me at least, is an easy task, as long as I have a topic. What is one to do, though, when sky is the limit and there are innumerable things to talk about under it? I racked my brain till absolutely the last minute. Writer's block is not quite the situation I am in. Perhaps I am, there is no certainty.

I am a student - therefore not an expert account on several topics. How, then, am I to do justice to my blog? Perhaps... I have an idea. What better a topic to write about than 'I, ME, MYSELF'. This is a topic I am quite an expert on, and i would like to think that i am quite a mystery. I may have insights for others, and others so too for me.

So finally, after many a thought and severe speculation, i have finally found myself a theme. my blog is going to go up and away, and, at the same time, I am on the path of further Self-discovery!! :)

beacon of the horizon

This was a poem i wrote some time back... It is one of my best work and means a lot to me. I says a lot about what i was feeling at the time, and even sometimes now, at the worst of days... I am hoping that reading it every time I open my blog will rekindle a little bit of that creative streak and writing spirit I seem to have lost... So here goes... It is called 'Beacon of the Horizon':

I felt the wet, moist ground under my feet,
I looked to the horizon where the sky and earth meet;
A crimson light adorned the line,
The magnificent beam looked, oh, so fine.

A warmth it spread inside my heart,
As i looked at where the two realms part.
The emptiness quit, my body light,
A little luck and all my might.
I walked away from where i stand,
Right beside you, you holding my hand.
Each step at a time - one by one,
The distance grew a little, then half a ton;

Now i stand so far from you,
Your figure blurring, memories a few.
The smile starts to fade as reality strikes,
The thorns on the rose turn into spikes.
I stand alone, with no one around,
Said good bye to friends, those i had found.

But the ground I now stand on leads to unchartered space.
I look around and know that this is the case -
The horizon I stand on between earth and sky,
Beholds the past and future, days bygone and those to come by.
Yesterday gave me experience, courage and strength,
Tomorrow sits on these, the moments that went.

Hands I held to make them strong,
And point out when they did wrong,
May not be part of my life today,
But even now I can hear them say -
"You are the Beacon, you are our light,
You gave us strength, courage and might.
You stand up tall, your destiny great,
Make your actions big, for the fruit do not wait."

And as again I look up high,
Stare right into the vast blue sky.
Each speck of life , I see so clear,
Each person who touched me, to the horizon they peer.
'Tis where I stand and this is what I know -
To yesterday its never goodbye, to tomorrow always a hello.